2026-09-13 The Kingdom Principle of obedience and honour

 (Eph 6:1-9)

Last week, Pastor Mike led us through the rest of Ephesians 5. Today, we’re gonna look at Ephesians 6:1–9. 6 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” 4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. 5 Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. 6 Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. 7 Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, 8 because you know that the Lord will reward each one for whatever good they do, whether they are slave or free. 9 And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him.

1, Obedience reveals who is King. (v.1,5,6)

In Ephesians 5, Paul says, “Be filled with the Holy Spirit.” We love experiencing the move of the Holy Spirit through worshipping, reading the Bible, and praying. But God fills us not to make us feel good, but to transform our lives and fulfil His calling. So Paul moves straight into our everyday relationships: husbands and wives, and then here in chapter 6, children and parents, servants and masters, in our context, employees and bosses, people and their leaders. Why? Because the Kingdom of God is not only demonstrated when we worship in church. The Kingdom is also demonstrated in the way we treat one another and respond to authority.

In this passage, one word keeps repeating: “Obey.”  V.1: “Children, obey your parents...” V.5: “Slaves, obey your earthly masters…V. 6: “Obey them not only to win their favor. In today’s world, no one likes hearing the word “obey,” because we think obedience means being like robots: “Just do whatever I say.” But notice, when Paul talks about obeying parents and masters, he keeps bringing everything back to Jesus. V.1, In the Lord…v. 5, As you would obey Christ…v.6, As slaves of Christ. Doing the will of God.

Why? Because ultimately, obedience is about who is King. Is Jesus the King? Or am I the king? We live in a democratic culture. Everyone has an opinion. We vote a government in, and we can vote them out. But God’s Kingdom is not a democracy. You can’t vote God out! The Kingdom of God is where the King rules. And the nature of the King determines the nature of His Kingdom. Our King rules in righteousness, justice, love, and mercy. Psalm 103:19 says, “The LORD has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.” Colossians 1:13 says that God has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into “the kingdom of the Son he loves.” And Revelation 19:16 declares that Jesus is “KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS.” Our God is absolutely in charge. We don’t get to vote on whether Jesus is right or wrong. Oh, you can vote, but there’s no election in heaven! His voice reigns. Daniel 4:37 says, “Everything He does is right and all His ways are just.” Some ask, “If God is such a good God, why do we live in such a messy world?” It is because humanity disobeyed God and chose to live apart from Him. So we may not always agree with Him; but He is not the One who needs to change, we are. Some may say, “I obey Jesus, but why should I obey parents, bosses, or leaders? They’re just human, they can be wrong.” Yes, Acts 5:29 says, “we must obey God rather than man.” The apostles said this because the leaders had forbidden them from speaking about Jesus. If human authority asks us to sin, lie, or disobey God, God remains the highest authority. But sometimes “They're wrong, why should I obey” really means, “I disagree with you. I think I know better. I have a better idea.” We confuse obedience with agreement. Obedience isn’t agreement.

If I only obey when I agree, that’s not Kingdom obedience, that’s agreement. Paul says we are to do “the will of God from your heart.” This is Kingdom obedience--from the heart, not just from the head. “Although I don’t agree, I pray and allow my heart to submit to God’s Word.” Just like Christ Jesus, the Son of God Himself, prayed, “Father, if it’s possible, take this cup away from me…but not my will, but Yours be done.”  That’s Kingdom obedience. The ultimate question about obedience is: “Who is King? Whose will be done?” “Lord, I don’t agree with my parents…my…I think my way is better…but I lay down my own thoughts, I choose to obey Your Word. I leave room for You to judge.”

When we truly allow Jesus to be King in our lives, obedience reveals His lordship. When we do our part, God will do the rest. I remember when God called us to give away our possessions and open our house, my parents didn’t understand. They felt upset and even stopped their relationship with me for three years. It was a very painful period. But God encouraged me to keep praying and loving them, while still obeying God rather than man. The testing was severe, but God was in charge. Three years later, my mum experienced God’s healing through repentance, and later my dad was baptised at Sumner Beach.

2. Honour positions us under God’s order.

v.2, Honor your father and mother”, which is the first commandment with a promise. The Greek word “honour” means value, worth, respect—to recognise the value and weight of the position God has given them.

Obedience is responding to authority from the heart; honour is valuing and respecting the person from the heart. A child can say, “Fine! I’ll do it!” then slam the door and carry resentment. Dishonour can be expressed through our words, “They don’t know anything.” “My father is stupid.” “My boss is useless.” “The leaders are terrible.” Or we expose their weaknesses, mock them, and judge them because “I know better.” There is a difference between discernment and dishonour. Discernment says: “I believe this decision is wrong, and I need to speak truthfully about it.” Dishonour says: “Because you are wrong, I now have permission to judge or mock you.” Discernment identifies what is wrong without judging the person. Dishonour uses what is wrong as a reason to attack the person.

That’s not what the Bible teaches us. In Luke 2:41-52, we see a twelve-year-old Jesus, when his parents anxiously came looking for him in the temple, Jesus replied to Mary, “Didn't you know I had to be in my Father's house?” (Luke 2:49) Jesus was right. Mary and Joseph didn't understand what He was saying. But then, v.51 says, he went down with them and was obedient to them. Jesus didn’t say, “you’re wrong, you don’t understand why I’m in the temple, so I don’t obey.” The parents just wanted the child to go home with them, they didn’t understand the Father’s business. But the twelve-year-old Jesus honoured His Heavenly Father by honouring the earthly parents He had placed Him under. Immediately, v.52 says, Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man. In other words, obedience and honour position us under God’s order of blessing.

3. Obedience releases God’s blessing.

This exactly fits Eph 6:2-3,  “Honour your father and mother”—“so that it may go well with you…”  Dishonouring, mocking, or judging our parents takes us out of God’s order of blessing and brings harmful consequences. It keeps us bound to the very patterns we judge in our parents. The same principle extends to our in-laws and other God-given authorities. Romans 2:1, …at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.” In other words, it shows a Kingdom principle, we reap what we sow. We can strongly judge others for doing wrong, while eventually practising the same thing ourselves. People say, “My father was controlling. I will never be like him.” Yet years later, they become controlling too. “My mother was angry. I hated her anger.” But eventually they sound like their mum. Dishonour and judgement keep us under family patterns, we judge them, we become like them. Forgiving and honouring parents, leaders, or other authority brings us under God’s order of blessing. And the greatest blessing is that we can be transformed to become more like Christ. In my ministry, I’ve witnessed people carrying all kinds of problems passed down through their families. Without realising it, they held grudges against their parents, or in-laws, or bosses, or government leaders…But as they repent, forgive, and turn to God’s way, they learn, “I can disagree without dishonouring or disliking the person. I can establish boundaries without becoming defensive. I can refuse something sinful without judgment or rebellion in my heart.” As they walk in the Kingdom principle of obedience and honour, they experience healing in their bodies, or marriages, or relationships, and even finances. Coz obedience and honour release blessing into our lives, while disobedience and rebellion bring harmful consequences.

However, honouring your parents doesn’t mean: “My father’s alcoholism was okay.” “My mother’s violence was okay.” “The abusive way I was treated didn’t matter.” No. It means: “What they did wasn’t right, but they were broken, so am I. We all need mercy. Jesus died on the cross for all of us. He is God, He has the ultimate authority. I release them to God and choose to forgive because He loves me, and I want to obey Him and live under His protection and blessing.”

And notice Paul also speaks to the person with authority: “Fathers, do not exasperate your children…” And then: “Masters, treat your slaves in the same way… since you know that He who is both their Master and yours is in heaven.” (v.9) In other words, everyone is under authority. The child is under Christ. The parent is under Christ. The worker is under Christ. The leader is under Christ. We will all give an account to Jesus, our King and Judge. Obedience is not weakness. Honour is not saying that wrong is right. It is saying, “Jesus, You are King. I choose to honour You by honouring the authority You have placed in my life. I wanna position myself under Your order, to end the ungodly patterns passed down to me, and walk in obedience to Your Word, so that Your Kingdom power and blessing can be released through my life and flow to my family and others.”

Prayer:

Yes, Lord, You’re worthy, worthy of our worship and honour. You are the King, King of kings. Your throne is established in heaven, and Your Kingdom rules over all.

Today, we choose to come under Your Kingdom authority and order.

If you’re reminded through the message of someone in authority, it could be your parents, in-laws, teachers, bosses, leaders, or pastors, you felt they were wrong, or you disagreed with them, and you became angry. Instead of allowing your heart to do the will of God and honour them, you judged them, mocked them, spoke against them, held grudges against them, or thought, “They know nothing. They’re useless. I know better.” Just bring that person before the Lord now.

The Bible says, if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If you like, you can repeat my prayer:

“Lord, thank You for loving me and giving me the opportunity to cleanse the house of my heart. Yes, I was reminded that I have carried judgement, anger, resentment, and dishonour towards ______. I thought I knew better. I thought I would do better than my parents, in-laws, leaders, or ______. I judged them and thought, ‘I will never be like them.’ But Your truth says, ‘You who pass judgement do the same things.’

I don’t wanna live under the power of dishonour, mocking, or judgement, which takes me out of God’s order of blessing and leaves me in fear, defensiveness, hiding, and judgement. These things keep me from Your love, joy, and peace.

I thank You that You poured out Your blood to forgive me. Today, I choose to forgive them (or myself), and release them from my judgement into Your hands, because You’re the King and Judge over all forever.

Holy Spirit, cleanse my heart from bitterness and dishonour. Break every ungodly pattern I’ve carried or repeated through unforgiveness and disobedience. Teach me to surrender to Your truth and yield to Your Spirit.”

Father, thank You for unfolding Your truth to us. Jesus, You are King, King of kings forever. Holy Spirit, guide us to position ourselves under Your order and walk in obedience and honour, so that Your Kingdom power and blessing can be released through our lives and flow to our families and others. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Small Group Discussions:

1, What does it mean to obey someone even when we disagree with them?

2, Why does our response to authority reveal who is King in our lives?

3, What is the difference between discernment and dishonour?

4, Is there someone in authority—parents, in-laws, bosses, leaders, or pastors—you find difficult to honour? Why? How can you obey God’s command to honour them?

5, What is God asking you to do this week to walk in obedience and honour?