【弗5:25】你们作丈夫的，要爱你们的妻子，正如基督爱教会，为教会舍己。【Eph5: 25】Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

保罗在这里把焦点转向丈夫的责任。若妻子的顺服是出于敬畏基督的心，那么丈夫的爱就必须以基督为榜样——不是掌控、不是支配，而是牺牲与成全。Here Paul shifts the focus to the husband’s calling. If a wife’s submission flows from reverence for Christ, then a husband’s love must follow the example of Christ—not controlling or dominating, but sacrificial and nurturing.

基督的爱是主动的、舍己的、洁净的爱。祂不是在我们完美时才爱，而是在我们还作罪人时就为我们死（罗5:8）。祂放下天上的荣耀，取了奴仆的形象，为要救赎、洁净我们，使我们成为圣洁荣耀的新妇。Christ’s love is active, selfless, and purifying. He didn’t love us because we were perfect, but while we were still sinners, He gave His life for us (Romans 5:8). He set aside His heavenly glory, took on the form of a servant, and came to redeem and cleanse us, making us His holy and radiant bride.祂为教会舍命，为要使教会得以恢复与荣耀；同样，丈夫也要用这样的爱去滋养、保护、建立妻子，使她在爱中被释放与成全。这种爱不是要求对方改变，而是以无条件的爱去感化、医治与扶持。He gave His life for the church to restore and honour her; in the same way, a husband is called to love, protect, and build up his wife so that she may be freed and fulfilled through love. This kind of love doesn’t demand change—it transforms, heals, and strengthens through unconditional care.当丈夫愿意舍己去爱、去聆听、去担当，妻子也更容易在爱中顺服；而当妻子出于信心与敬畏顺服，丈夫也更容易被神感动去爱。这是一个彼此成全、彼此造就的属灵循环。When a husband is willing to love selflessly, to listen and carry responsibility, his wife finds it easier to submit in love; and when the wife submits out of faith and reverence, the husband’s heart is moved by God to love more deeply. It becomes a spiritual rhythm of mutual blessing.婚姻不再是争夺和较量，而是恩典的流通——丈夫的舍己引出妻子的顺服，妻子的顺服激发丈夫更深的舍己。Marriage stops being a struggle for control and becomes a flow of grace—the husband’s self-giving inspires the wife’s submission, and the wife’s submission draws out even deeper love from the husband.

我曾经滥用过丈夫的权柄，让妻子陪我走过许多艰难，也受了不少损失。后来我明白，若丈夫活在旧人里，权柄带来的只是伤害；I once misused my authority as a husband, and my wife suffered with me through many hardships and losses. Later I realised that when a husband lives in the old self, authority only wounds;但若丈夫活在新人里，先顺服基督的主权，在祷告中寻求神的心意，不倚靠己见，在环境中尊主为大，让“耶稣是我家之主”成为实际，家庭就会进入神的祝福。but when he lives as a new man under Christ’s lordship—seeking God’s will in prayer, not leaning on his own understanding, and honouring Christ in every situation—then “Jesus is the Lord of our home” becomes real, and the family steps into God’s blessing.

婚姻也让我经历，真正的权柄不是用来压制，而是用来服事。耶稣说：“人子来，不是要受人的服事，乃是要服事人，并且舍命作多人的赎价。”（太20:28）Marriage has also taught me that real authority isn’t for controlling others—it’s for serving. Jesus said, “The Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:28).同样，丈夫的领导不是出于地位，而是出于爱；不是为了面子或自我，而是为了使妻子和家庭蒙福。“为妻子舍己”，不是浪漫的口号，而是日常生活中一次次选择放下自我——In the same way, a husband’s leadership isn’t about status but about love; not for pride or self, but to bring blessing to his wife and family. “Laying down one’s life for one’s wife” isn’t just a poetic idea it’s a daily choice to lay aside self:—在忙碌中仍愿意聆听，在疲惫中仍愿意安慰；在妻子软弱时愿意陪伴、呵护、代祷。这样的爱，使妻子能安心地信任，也让家的氛围充满温柔与安全。to listen even when busy, to comfort even when tired, to stand by, care for, and pray when one’s wife feels weak. Such love builds trust and brings a gentle, safe warmth to the home.夫妻难免有冲突与误会，但基督的爱教导丈夫放下“谁对谁错”的争执，以宽恕代替指责，以聆听代替防卫。在分歧时不求赢，而是追求合一；Conflict and misunderstanding are part of marriage, but Christ’s love teaches husbands to stop fighting over who’s right or wrong—to replace blame with forgiveness, and defensiveness with listening. In moments of disagreement, the goal isn’t to win but to seek unity.当丈夫愿意先低头、先道歉、先伸出手去修复、去拥抱妻子时，神的同在与平安就会临到家中。When a husband chooses to bow first, apologise first, and reach out first to mend the relationship and embrace his wife, God’s peace and presence fill the home.

主耶稣，感谢祢以舍己的爱来爱我们。求祢教导每一位丈夫，学习祢的样式——在家庭中以谦卑服事代替掌控，以祷告顺服代替倚靠己意。Lord Jesus, thank You for loving us with a self-giving love. Teach every husband to follow Your example—to lead through humble service instead of control, and through prayerful surrender instead of self-will.愿丈夫们在爱中彰显祢的心肠，成为家中的牧者与守护者；愿妻子们在爱中得安息，在信靠顺服中被建立。愿我们的婚姻成为祢福音的见证，让爱与顺服在圣灵的带领下彼此成全，使家庭成为祢荣耀的居所。May husbands reflect Your heart of love, becoming shepherds and protectors in their homes; may wives find rest in love, growing strong through trust and obedience. Let our marriages become testimonies of the gospel—where love and submission, under the Spirit’s leading, build one another up.愿丈夫都在婚姻里操练，基督舍己的爱，妻子回应以敬畏与顺服。让祢那不求自己益处、只求神旨意成全的真爱，充满我们的家庭。“丈夫当照样爱妻子，如同爱自己的身子；爱妻子，便是爱自己。”（弗5:28）愿更多的婚姻成为夫妻同心、彼此成全、双双得胜、荣耀祢名的见证。May every husband practise Christ’s self-giving love, and every wife respond in reverence and trust. Let Your love—seeking not its own benefit but the Father’s will—fill our families. “In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself” (Ephesians 5:28). May more marriages become witnesses of unity, mutual growth, shared victory, and glory to Your name.

（陈帅弟兄 Raymond Chan）