Lili’s testimony

Learning to Give Thanks, Trust God and Be Changed

Dear brothers and sisters, My name is Annie. I’m very grateful for the opportunity to stand here today and share how God has guided and changed my life. Three weeks ago, Pastor Jane and Raymond told me they had seen a big change in me since I started coming to church. They said that, in the past, I often looked weighed down and quiet. Now, when they see me, they see joy in me and a smile on my face.

I believe this change hasn’t come from my own strength. God has been gently at work in my life. So today, I’m not here to tell you how I made myself better. I’m here to share how God has been teaching me to give thanks, pray and trust him, and how he has gradually renewed my life.

1. From worrying and trying to control everything to trusting God

Many years ago, my mother became ill. I became very aware of how limited we are as human beings. A friend shared the gospel with me, and I put my faith in Jesus.

While I was still living in my hometown, I experienced many of God’s blessings. But I was still used to relying on myself. When pressure or problems came, I easily became anxious. I felt safe when I could control everything. The more tightly I tried to hold on to things, the less peace I had in my heart.

I came to Christchurch to support my daughter with her studies. At first, I thought it was simply my own plan. But after I arrived, I had more time to be still, read the Bible, pray and draw close to God. I began to realise that coming here was part of God’s good plan for me.

One Sunday, I came to worship carrying many pressures. As the worship songs began, the Holy Spirit touched my heart. The anxiety and hurt I had held inside for so long began to come out. I was deeply touched by God’s love, and tears came to my eyes. My circumstances hadn’t changed, but the worry began to lift, and my heart found rest in God. I began to understand that I can do what I need to do without trying to control the outcome. 1 Peter 5:7 NIV says, “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” I had read this verse many times before, but now I’m beginning to put it into practice and live it out.

2. What I thought was my own choice became a sign of God’s guidance

When I first arrived in New Zealand, I was most worried about my visa. The immigration adviser thought the application was risky, so we only dared to apply for a one-year visa. In the past, I would have worried all day and tried hard to control the outcome. This time, though, I felt sure that God would sustain me.

And God was gracious. My visa was approved. Although we applied for one year, I was granted a three-year visa—far more than I had expected.

Just two weeks after I arrived, I was in a car accident. I was new to the country and still unfamiliar with the roads. As I turned at an intersection, I moved into the other lane and hit another car. The other car spun around 180 degrees.

I was in a new country and felt very scared. The first thing I did was pray and ask God to keep everyone safe.

Two workers from a nearby car repair workshop came over to comfort me. They gave me some hot water, helped manage the scene and called the police. My former landlord also came to be with me. Thankfully, everyone was safe, and the other car could still be driven. My car needed repairs, but I had insurance, so I didn’t face a huge financial burden.

Later, when I was looking for a place to live, the first house I viewed had a pear tree in full blossom by the front door. The petals were falling gently in the breeze. In that moment, I knew this was the home God had prepared for me.

These small things meant a lot to me so far from home. They showed me how carefully God was looking after me. I gradually came to see that coming to Christchurch wasn’t only my own choice; it was also the place God had prepared for my daughter and me. True peace doesn’t mean that everything goes the way I want. It means that whatever happens, I know I am in God’s hands.

3. God gave us a spiritual home

After arriving in Christchurch, I prayed and asked God to lead us to a church. He brought us to OTBC, where I found a spiritual home and received so much support from the brothers and sisters.

I still remember my first Sunday service. We were new to Christchurch, and after the service my daughter and I held hands and smiled at each other. A sense of warmth and peace filled my heart. In that moment, I felt deeply: “I’m home.”

I became involved in church life. On Thursdays, I went to Bible study, served in the kitchen and shared meals with others. On Sundays, we worshipped together and helped prepare food. Learning God’s truth and serving one another as part of the everyday life of the church was exactly the kind of Christian life I had always longed for.

There’s another small act of kindness that I’ve never forgotten. When my daughter started school, Sister Vicky heard that we didn’t have a school uniform. She carefully washed and ironed one that fitted my daughter, then travelled a long way to bring it to us.

In a new country, the brothers and sisters remembered even our small needs. It helped me understand that God had given me more than a place to settle. He had given me a spiritual family who love one another.

4. I’m thankful that my daughter came to know God here

My daughter came to know God through OTBC and was baptised. As a mother, I see this as one of the most precious blessings God has given me.

I used to hope that my daughter would have a wonderful future, and I wanted to control the direction of her life. But God has been changing the way I think. He has helped me understand that my daughter is someone he has entrusted to me.

When my daughter and I disagreed in the past, I could be impatient. Now I’m learning to pause and pray first, let go of control, and listen to and understand her. I’m gradually learning to control less and pray more, and to be less stubborn and trust God more. I entrust my daughter’s future to God, because her Father in heaven loves her even more than I do. Our relationship is getting better and better.

5. God changed my heart, not just my circumstances

Through the care of the church, Bible study and prayer, God has deeply renewed my heart. This is one of the most precious gifts he has given me.

Through the sermons and fellowship with the brothers and sisters, I began to see what I was like before. I saw the pride in my heart. I was often stubborn and insisted on my own opinions, and I was quick to judge others. I thought I had let go of some hurts from the past, but deep down I hadn’t truly forgiven.

One day, while I was driving, the Holy Spirit reminded me that there were still people and things I hadn’t forgiven. I was surprised. I thought I had already moved on, but I realised I was still held back by what had happened.

I came before God, confessed and repented. I let go of my resentment, prayed for this person, and asked God to bless them, guide them and draw them to himself. As I entrusted this matter to God again and again, the heaviness in my heart gradually lifted. In its place, I began to feel peace and joy.

God is teaching me not to keep focusing on other people’s faults, but to examine my own heart: Am I being proud? Am I judging others? Am I willing to forgive?

I am still imperfect and still have weaknesses. But God has changed more than my circumstances; he has changed my heart. I’ve learnt to turn to God in prayer rather than insist that I’m right. God opposes pride and blesses the humble.

6. God is teaching me to give thanks and live in the present

I used to worry a lot about the future and didn’t know how to appreciate the present. Now I’m learning to entrust each day to God and look to him.

When I’m out walking, the blue sky, the clouds, the flowers and the fresh breeze can all fill my heart with gratitude. Even ordinary things can remind me of God’s goodness.

Giving thanks doesn’t mean that life is free from difficulties. In ordinary times and in difficult times, we can see that God is with us and gracious to us. Having our family with us and sharing the love of our brothers and sisters are all gifts from God.

I’m learning to treasure the present. Each day is a gift from God.

7. I want to share this hope with more people

I often pray for my family, my friends, the brothers and sisters at church, and those who don’t yet know the Lord. During worship, I’m often moved to tears by God’s love. There is pain and brokenness in this world, but Jesus gives us an eternal hope.

Revelation 21:4 NIV says, “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain.”

This hope warms my heart, and I long for more people to know Jesus and find true peace. I can start with small things: I can pray, care for the people around me, and share the gospel when the time is right. In this way, I can pass on God’s love.

8. Grace has been with me all along

One day, Jane and Raymond told me they had seen a change in me. They asked if I would be willing to share with everyone what God had been doing in my life. Just after I agreed to share my testimony, I faced a test of faith.

I received a phone call from someone claiming to work for New Zealand’s Ministry of Health. They said I had received medical treatment in Wellington. Then they gave me a series of details that sounded convincing. I began to believe that my personal information had been leaked and used fraudulently, and that I might be involved in money laundering or had broken the law.

I panicked. I worried that I might be sent back to China. What would happen to my daughter? What if I had to help the Chinese police with an investigation? What if I was detained because I didn’t have enough evidence to prove I was innocent? What would I do?

At first, I thought this might be a test of my faith, and that I needed to rely on God and glorify him. But as my fear grew, I became caught up in what was happening right in front of me. I forgot that God was the one I should truly rely on.

The callers also asked me to report my whereabouts every three hours. The more I let them lead me, the more confused I became. Anxiety and fear took hold, and I gradually lost my ability to think clearly.

On the morning of the sixth day after this began, I knew I needed to seek God’s help. I went and knocked on Jane and Raymond’s door. Jane led me in prayer.

As we prayed, I saw how little I was trusting God. I often said that I trusted him, but when difficulties really came, I was still controlled by fear and worry. I had forgotten that God was still in control. I admitted my weakness to God and asked him to forgive me and help me learn again to trust him and surrender everything to him. After we prayed, my heart gradually became calm. I also knew that when times are difficult, that is when I especially need to rely on God and trust that he is sovereign.

Jane then left for a meeting. Just as I was getting ready to leave, Raymond and I started talking again. With his help, we began to realise that this was probably a scam.

Later that afternoon, when Jane heard what had happened, she prayed and felt prompted to search on Google. She found reports describing a very similar type of scam and sent me a lot of information.

At that moment, I felt both afraid and thankful. I was afraid that I had let fear lead me for so many days and had lost my ability to judge the situation clearly. But I was thankful that, when I was at my most helpless, God used the prayers, care and help of the brothers and sisters to help me gradually see what was really happening. God truly is sovereign over all things.

I reported the matter to the police straight away and took steps to protect my bank accounts and personal information. Thank the Lord, I didn’t suffer any financial loss. This experience helped me understand more deeply that money can be stolen or taken through a scam, but those who rely on God can live securely.

Proverbs 23:5 NIV, “Cast but a glance at riches, and they are gone, for they will surely sprout wings and fly off to the sky like an eagle.”

When I look back over my life, I can see God’s grace all along the way. He watched over me in my hometown, and he guided me when I came to Christchurch. There has been grace in the good times, and in difficult times God has also provided for me in wonderful ways.

God has taught me to let go of control and learn to entrust things to him. He has taught me to examine my heart, to be humble and to forgive. He has taught me not only to read the Bible and listen to sermons, but also to live out the truth and be a witness to his grace.

I am still weak and imperfect. There are probably still strongholds of fear and worry in my heart. But my heart is full of gratitude. God has never left me. He has guided me, shaped me and renewed my life all along the way. I am weak, and sometimes I stumble, but God is sovereign, he is love, he is good, and he will not let me down.

I am still in the process of becoming more like Jesus. I am limited and small, but I am willing to offer myself to God. By his grace, I can stand firm. In the days ahead, I will continue following the Lord humbly. I want to live out my faith through forgiveness, obedience and love, and to be salt and light in the world, witnessing to the Lord’s grace.

I am thankful for his grace, which has been with me all along! May all glory, praise and honour be given to our loving Lord Jesus Christ.

Thank you.